Judi and I have had the privilege working on several occasions with a mission (Christian Missionary Fellowship) that focuses on unreached people groups in Tanzania. These folk were instrumental in starting the Vineyard in Arusha, where we now serve as team leaders.
We were asked to take a week's teaching on Marriage for their students - prospective church planters.
We had an amazing first day with couples from Barbaig, Nyaturu, Sandawe and Maasai tribes. We compared and contrasted the marriage values each tribe had in light of Scripture, how husbands resembled Christ. As far as we can tell, the Sandawe have a lot to teach us Westerners and fellow Africans (with a few serious negatives).
Below is the limited list they came up with in the alloted time, documented largely in their own words.
BARBAIG
- Peacemakers
- quarreling with neighbours is a sin that is totally unforgivable (I suspect they mean 'unacceptable')
- a sacrifice is offered and the quarreling parties are covered in its blood for reconciliation
- the husbands are the 'guards of peace' for their family
Cultural 'challenges'...
- beatings are common and expected
- one's wife belongs to the whole boma (family cluster of homes)
- polygamy up to 11 wives
SANDAWE
- very loving
- monogamous
- couples walk together, holding hands (very rare)
- helps with household chores & kids
'Challenges'...
- arranged sex outside of marriage if wives are barren
- wife beatings are frequent and may be fatal. Women have no recourse.
NYATURU
- peacemakers
- men are generous and loving
- fights between couples are resolved in the company of tribal elders (if man is guilty, he is fined a goat or cow...)
'Challenges'...
- beatings are commonplace
- polygamous
- no expected heart forgiveness even after "reconciliation" by tribal elders
- never assist wives in any way in the home
- when faced with problems, will desert their families.
MAASAI
- husbands are highly protective of their families
- love their wives
- fathers are head of their families (no one overpowers him)
'Challenges'...
- polygamous
- affairs are commonplace
- women and children treated on same level (low status)
- wife beatings are common and culturally acceptable.
These issues are what these dear men and women face as they return to set up church in their people group. Remember, these folk are from areas where there are no Christian churches of any denomination, and the name of Christ is unknown within a large minimum radius of their location.
Day two with the students and some shocking discoveries re myths, beliefs and practices of these tribes on sex. Among them, up to three years abstinence for fear of affecting a fetus pre-birth and period of breast-feeding because of affecting milk? Any wonder there are issues of infidelity, many cases culturally accepted and arranged by the wives!?
Simply put, truth sets people free - with three pregnant women among the seven couples, along with two breast-feeding mums, the countering truths we taught became a practical reality and good news for all involved!
Day three - general review reveals they are really getting it ... most of it at least!
We covered Gary Chapman's "Five Love Languages", a little challenging given the strong cultural expectations regarding how a man or woman is to demonstrate love in their tribal context.
However, they did identify their personal love language and attempted to identify that of their spouse. A few got it right, but it also brought up a lot of pain, which we were able to talk and pray through.
Tomorrow we take on the huge issue of 'in-laws'. This proved a major challenge last time we taught this ... pray for us!
We were asked to take a week's teaching on Marriage for their students - prospective church planters.
We had an amazing first day with couples from Barbaig, Nyaturu, Sandawe and Maasai tribes. We compared and contrasted the marriage values each tribe had in light of Scripture, how husbands resembled Christ. As far as we can tell, the Sandawe have a lot to teach us Westerners and fellow Africans (with a few serious negatives).
Below is the limited list they came up with in the alloted time, documented largely in their own words.
BARBAIG
- Peacemakers
- quarreling with neighbours is a sin that is totally unforgivable (I suspect they mean 'unacceptable')
- a sacrifice is offered and the quarreling parties are covered in its blood for reconciliation
- the husbands are the 'guards of peace' for their family
Cultural 'challenges'...
- beatings are common and expected
- one's wife belongs to the whole boma (family cluster of homes)
- polygamy up to 11 wives
SANDAWE
- very loving
- monogamous
- couples walk together, holding hands (very rare)
- helps with household chores & kids
'Challenges'...
- arranged sex outside of marriage if wives are barren
- wife beatings are frequent and may be fatal. Women have no recourse.
NYATURU
- peacemakers
- men are generous and loving
- fights between couples are resolved in the company of tribal elders (if man is guilty, he is fined a goat or cow...)
'Challenges'...
- beatings are commonplace
- polygamous
- no expected heart forgiveness even after "reconciliation" by tribal elders
- never assist wives in any way in the home
- when faced with problems, will desert their families.
MAASAI
- husbands are highly protective of their families
- love their wives
- fathers are head of their families (no one overpowers him)
'Challenges'...
- polygamous
- affairs are commonplace
- women and children treated on same level (low status)
- wife beatings are common and culturally acceptable.
These issues are what these dear men and women face as they return to set up church in their people group. Remember, these folk are from areas where there are no Christian churches of any denomination, and the name of Christ is unknown within a large minimum radius of their location.
Day two with the students and some shocking discoveries re myths, beliefs and practices of these tribes on sex. Among them, up to three years abstinence for fear of affecting a fetus pre-birth and period of breast-feeding because of affecting milk? Any wonder there are issues of infidelity, many cases culturally accepted and arranged by the wives!?
Simply put, truth sets people free - with three pregnant women among the seven couples, along with two breast-feeding mums, the countering truths we taught became a practical reality and good news for all involved!
Day three - general review reveals they are really getting it ... most of it at least!
We covered Gary Chapman's "Five Love Languages", a little challenging given the strong cultural expectations regarding how a man or woman is to demonstrate love in their tribal context.
However, they did identify their personal love language and attempted to identify that of their spouse. A few got it right, but it also brought up a lot of pain, which we were able to talk and pray through.
Tomorrow we take on the huge issue of 'in-laws'. This proved a major challenge last time we taught this ... pray for us!
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